An Addendum to Sentimentality

To Whom It May Concern — and unfortunately, that now appears to include you. I don’t believe in welcoming new arrivals with loose sentiment or folklore. But I’ve been told some form of introduction is required of me. 

Fine.

 Let me first be clear, I was not consulted in the writing of the previous “welcome” message. This is not a complaint; it is merely a clarification. Some entries arrive in a genteel manner; others arrive in a scuffle and flurry. I file what I am give and pay as little mind to the rest as one possibly can while maintaining any sense of propriety.

 While certain parties (see: Root, Nana) may find your arrival “auspicious” or “welcoming” or whatever other adjective they’re currently misapplying to your arrival, I feel it is important to move forward with both feet firmly planted on the ground and all extremities intact, which is to say — heed my warnings when they are given and do not fall victim to the follies and delusions of one “Nana Root” in regard to the plants in which I attend. 

While the Emporium above is well-lit and steeped in warmth, there is a portion of the collection kept elsewhere. My collection. For good reason. Not all leaves belong in tea. Not all blossoms are “blessings.” Some plants would just as soon knock you about the head and shoulders and rob you of your senses. I speak from experience. But that is for another time entirely. 

There are those who believe knowledge of poisonous plants invites danger. In truth, it is ignorance that makes the most reliable accomplice to disaster. Aconite is not more toxic because it is known. Atropa belladonna does not strike more often because it was named. Poison is not malice. It is chemistry with consequences. 

To pretend the world offers only comfort is to walk backward into a hedgerow of thorns and feign surprise when you bleed. The purpose of this archive is not to tempt or frighten. It is to document and understand those plants. The ones she says are “misunderstood” as if they are rebellious teenagers and not botanical obscurities that can and will turn “oops” into a permanent dissolution of your mortal constitution. 

Do not, under any circumstances, wander the cellar unsupervised. If you find yourself in an unsupervised situation, immediately alert supervision. If no supervision is available. Best of luck to you. We assume no responsibility for what happens next. I will file your safety under “unheeded.”  

Regarding Nana Root with all necessary respect. You may think I dislike her. On the contrary, she is, unquestionably, the heart of the Emporium. She makes tea. She remembers dreams. She speaks to the plants in a way that I simply cannot. We disagree on methodology. That is all. She tends. I contain. We both listen.  

She is correct, each month a plant will undergo further scrutiny and study, she calls them her “Monthly Marvels,” I say Monthly Botanical Observations. I do not speak for the plants, the plants do not speak for me, nor make decisions on my behalf. On the monthly, I will turn to the preliminary index of specimens that should never be cultivated, collected, or even remembered fondly from my:  

Florilegium Nocturnum: A Compendium of Harmful Delights and Venefic Flora Collected, Annotated, and Ill-Advisedly Preseved by yours truly, endorsed and previously published by [redacted] to choose a plant to go along with her “allies.”

 Do with the information I provide what you will. Ideally nothing. That’s the safest. This collection is not meant to encourage use, nor admiration, though I suppose both are inevitable. It is simply meant to outlive me. The plants herein are dangerous. If you handle them, do so gently. If you catalogue them, do so accurately. If you speak of them, be sure no one is listening. I’ve left my notes where they may be useful. Further entries will follow. Against my will and better judgment and so on and so forth etc. etc. You’re welcome.